Baby on Board

Our son came into the world at 3:15am on November 16th, 2009. My due date of November 8th had come and gone by then, and, when I was told on November 10th that I was not at all dilated and that a due date could not be determined, I made the decision to have my labor induced. This decision was made partly due to financial reasons. I could only take one month off work and I had already been off for almost a week. I wanted to have as much time at home with the baby as possible. So, on Sunday, November 15th, a little after Midnight, my husband and I checked into the Sunnyside Kasier Labor and Delivery Ward in Clackamas Oregon and settled into the room where our son would soon (we hoped it would be soon anyway) be making his grand entrance.

The doctors gave me a pill at almost 1am that was supposed to jump start my contractions. They explained that once my contractions were coming at an optimal rate, they would get me started on pitocin. At 8am on November 15th, they started me on pitocin. They started me at 2 drops an hour. They would check on me every hour to see if the dosage needed to be increased. And oh did they increase it. By 5:30pm, they had me on 12 drops an hour (this sounded like a lot to me but apparently I was lucky as the nurse mentioned that some patients have to have up to 20 drops per hour). By this point I had gone from being not at all dilated at 7am to 3cm at 5:30pm. My contractions seemed to be off the chart and, although I was utilizing the birthing ball, the bathtub and my breathing exercises by that point, nothing seemed to be able to alleviate the pain of the contractions. My husband sat patiently by my side as the hours ticked by and I alternated between squeezing the circulation from his hands, telling him I loved him and not wanting him in the room. My contractions were coming 60 seconds apart and lasting about 30 seconds each. Hour after hour of this had broken me down and I found myself sobbing in the bathtub, just wanting the pain to subside.

At around 6pm, the lovely nurse and midwife that would eventually deliver our baby came in to see how I was doing. Upon seeing my husbands hand clenched in mine and seeing the distress that I was in, the midwife called in the anesthesiologist to give me my epidural. The next few hours after that were a happy, hazy blur. I didn't feel anything and I slept peacefully as my contractions progressed. The nurse and midwife woke me up occasionally to get my vitals. At around Midnight, the nurse called the midwife in to address a concern regarding the baby's heartbeat, the midwife acknowledged that concern and broke my water. The nurse had me start pushing and had me continue to do so until about 1am at which point she noted that the baby was not far enough down and suggested I sleep for a while longer. The nurse and the midwife came back in at 2am and had me begin pushing again. I don't ever remember such a strange experience as giving birth. I felt nauseous and so thirsty. I was *pushing* as hard as I could but the nurse kept prompting me to push more (which I don't think was possible). I was frustrated and scared and overwhelmed by the burning sensation of my body opening to accommodate the baby as well as the incredible ball of pressure that I was feeling.

At about 3:00am the nurse let us know that she could see the head crowning and asked if I wanted to reach down and feel it. At that point, the pressure and burning sensations I was feeling were so great that the last thing I wanted to do was to reach down and feel the baby's head so I opted to just keep pushing. At 3:15am, the baby's head fully emerged and I felt a warm gush as the body followed. I didn't hear the baby crying and the midwife was speaking urgently to the nurse. I panicked as I realized that the cord was wrapped around the baby's neck (I would later find out that the cord was wrapped around his neck 3 times). After they cut the cord, he still did not cry for a moment or two and the world seemed to stop. Suddenly, I heard his cry and I lay back on the bed exhausted but relieved. We had done it and our son was finally here!

The nurse took Johnny aside and they weighed Giovanni, brushed his feet with ink to get his footprints, and gave him a sponge bath. They then handed him to me and I held his bare skin to mine and kissed his head. I spoke to him gently and he seemed to recognize my voice. He looked at me with his big, trusting eyes and snuggled against me. I remember thinking that he just had the most perfect, beautiful little face and features.

Giovanni's first few weeks at home have not been without trial. I got an infection in my left breast, Johnny (my husband) nearly cut off his thumb in a freak accident, and baby G has had bouts of colic and acid reflux that span from screaming fits to sleepless nights. We are all learning though, to work together as a family, as a team to try and understand each other and get used to this new life. Johnny and I are beginning to fall in love with the baby and take turns rocking him, singing to him and snuggling next to him in play and in sleep.

This baby is a precious gift and as he becomes more alert and aware and astounds us with the knowledge that he was created inside of me and that we have been entrusted with the responsibility of raising him and teaching him about the world around him, I can't help but to fall ever more madly in love with him. Watching him discover the world around him makes me feel like, in some ways, I am discovering it for the first time too.

Welcome to the world Giovanni Elijah Cabrera!

-New Mommy in Town

Breathe in, Breathe out, Breathe Easy

I cannot believe that my due date is a mere 7 days away (hopefully not longer!). I am feeling many uncomfortable pangs these days, everything from mild back pain to heartburn to excruciating pelvic pressure. All I can do is keep myself occupied, continue to ready the house for baby and try to get some sleep in here and there.

As the date approaches, I am getting more nervous, excited too, but a bit anxious. I try not to read TOO much information about babies these days and I am relying more on what my doctor tells me at each visit rather than the stack of printed materials they shower me with. Not that I don't enjoy reading about how to make sure baby's umbilical cor doesn't get infected, how to install a car seat properly, how to breastfeed properly and how to protect against SIDS, Flat Head Syndrome and Rickets all in one sitting, but I find that too much information, taken in all at once is more conducive to a full blown anxiety attack than to feeling like a well informed, confident parent.

So...as the days tick by, I have been looking around our nursery with a sense of pride at all the preparation that we have gotten done, I wonder at every quiet, peaceful moment with my husband, "is this the last one of these we'll have" and I get a little anxious thinking about this whole new life we are entering into. But above all, I am trying to keep the faith. Faith that my marriage will be strong enough to withstand sleepless nights along with a mountain of chores and bills, faith that my baby will be healthy and strong, faith that together my husband and I will raise a well adjusted child that will choose the moral high ground no matter what this crazy world might try to throw at him. I am realizing that now, more than ever, I need to stay present, live in the moment and take things one day at a time. All I can do is try my best and hope that with a mountain of faith, a whole lot of patience, and a little wisdom, everything will be all right!!

So here, as I begin, just like so many women before me have and countless women after me will, an anxious but eager warrior, facing the unknown with a sense of trepidation and wonder, committing to protect my baby from environmental pollutants, flat head syndrome, buck teeth, rickets and vitamin D deficiency, I will use the tools that life has given me to try and figure it all out in time. Throughout this journey, I will continue to work with my doctors, my husband, my baby and my own best instincts to provide my child with the best life that I can provide him.

In doing this, I can rest assured of at least this much- that at the end of the day, although I might be new to this, and although situations may be thrown at me that I have no idea how to handle, I will pray for wisdom, do my best and continue to observe life (mine, my husbands and my child's) as it unfold around me, exactly as God has intended it to.

Breathe in, Breathe out, Breathe Easy,

-New Mommy in Town

`And I Think to Myself, What a Wonderful World...

As the dog days of Summer slowly give way to the crisp, clean days of Fall (my favorite season) I am feeling inspired and invigorated by the sense that magical happenings are on the horizon for, not only myself, but for my family and my loved ones as well. Not only will I be welcoming my beautiful boy into the world in just a few short weeks (or less depending on what fate has in store for me). But I have lately been shrouded in a cloak of warn, fuzzy feelings and a sense of security like I have rarely felt before.

Part of this, I know is due to the time of year and the weather. How can one not be inspired when met with beautiful, blue, cloudless skies each morning, a cool breeze, the sound of the wind at their back as they walk along and the site of children already in Halloween costumes as they accompany their parents on errands or a weekend trip to the pumpkin patch. The leaves are beginning to change, holding the promise of soon filling the Columbia River Gorge and surrounding areas with breathtaking amber-gold beauty.

As reality begins to settle in around me and I realize that soon, I will be facing the longest and most important journey of my life. I am filled not with anxiety or fear but with an overwhelming sense of well being and freedom. I just instinctively know that my child and I will have an intensely close bond and I am aching to meet him, hold him close to me and begin to help shape him into the man that he will become. I feel like I will be a good mom and I am so thankful that my current work hours are such that I can afford the time to get to know my son and learn how to be a mother to him.

This feeling of peace has been a welcome change, as or the last month or so, I had found myself itching to return to a full time job and the money that comes with it. However, as my due date fast approaches, that urgency has been calmed and replaced with a sense that everything is happening and will happen as it should and that, when the time is right for me and my family, everything will fall into place just as it is meant to. To try and put this feeling into words that are relateable, it is almost as though I were being held for a time, in the giant fist of the universe, surrounded by darkness and feeling lost and unsure. But, in the last month, that grasp has been slowly opening. And with every finger that lays itself flat around me, I am being illuminated by light and positivity, assuring me that I am in and have been traveling towards the place I was supposed to be all along.

To add to my joy, I have been blessed lately with a close time of bonding and sharing these last quiet days with my husband. I feel very close to him these days and I thank God for bringing us together and allowing us this journey together.

It is not just my own life for which I feel these feelings of well being. My mother, who is an avid writer and childcare provider, has been busy writing up a storm and looking for childcare work. She will be coming up for a month after the baby is born and her presence will be a welcome, much needed gift during what is sure to be a blessed, yet trying time. My dad, a cross country truck driver has a schedule now where he is afforded the time and resources he needs to begin to put down some roots of his own and make some positive changes in his life. My husbands job is going well and we thank God for the good fortune of him having steady, well paying work in these trying times.

So, as the days roll on and the seasons change, I hope that this sense of well being and peace not only continue to permeate and guide my own life, but the lives of all that share this small space called earth. I will be praying that this holiday season brings a wealth of love to all, bringing families together and in spring us to share our time or whatever resources we may have with those around us that are less fortunate.

And to all, a Good Night :)

-New Mommy in Town

Who Says You Can't Get Anything For FREE?

If you find yourself with some FREE time on your hands, why not check out some of these FREE, fun websites? Below are some of my favorites!

Free Rice
This website lets you answer trivia questions for a good cause! For every answer you get right, the site will donate 10 grains of rice through the UN World Food program to help end hunger

Click here to answer questions for a good cause

Magnetic Poetry
Creativity at your fingertips- Itching for something to write but stuck in a rut? Find creativity with a click of your mouse by playing with Magnetic Poetry online!

Click here for Magnetic Poetry

Trivia Cafe
Get your Trivia on at the Trivia Cafe. Lots of brain teasing questions to get your mind racing!

Click here for fun trivia

Bookworm
Free, fun word game for users of all ages. This one gets harder as you go along

Click here to find YOUR inner Bookworm

Learn More Stuff
For inquisitive minds that are always wanting to learn more about "stuff". This site is great to browse through and increase your useless knowledge or to get answers to questions you've always wondered about but haven't known where to look. Aptly titled "How Stuff Works!"

Click here to learn How Stuff Works

Guide to Making Your Own Baby Food

Although the time to feed baby solid foods is still a long ways away, I have become very interested in the health benefits (and cost savings) involved with homemade baby foods. I figure that, with a little planning, a blender, a fork, a strainer, a food mill or a baby food grinder, I can just as easily make foods for my baby at home. It is exciting to know that, with minimal effort, I can provide my child with food as nutritious, if not more nutritious, than store-bought baby foods. So, with a little research I have found some helpful tips and recipes for making healthy, delicious homemade foods for my little one when he is ready for them!

Tips for Making Homemade Baby Food

• Work under the most sanitary conditions possible.
• Wash your hands with hot water and soap, scrub, rinse and dry with clean towel before fixing your baby’s food, before feeding your baby, and after changing your baby’s diapers.
• Scrub all working surfaces with soap and hot water.
• Scrub all equipment with soap and hot water, and rinse well.
• Prepare fresh fruits or vegetables by scrubbing, paring or peeling, and removing seeds.
• Prepare meats by removing all bones, skin, connective tissue, gristle and fat.
• Cook foods, when necessary, boiling them in a small, covered saucepan with a small amount of water until tender. The amount of water is important — the less water used, the more nutrients stay in the food.
• Puree food using a blender, food processor, baby food grinder, spoon or fork. Grind up tough foods. Cut food into small pieces or thin slices. Take out seeds and pits from fruit.
• Test for smoothness by rubbing a small amount of food between your fingers. Add a liquid such as formula, water or fruit juice to achieve a desired consistency.
• If pureed food is not being used right away, refrigerate quickly.
• To freeze: pour cooled, pureed food into a paper cupcake liner or a section of a clean ice cube tray, and cover with foil. When frozen solid, store cubes in a freezer container in the freezer in a freezer bag or box.
• Reheat frozen cube in a heat-resistant container in a pan of hot water.
• When cooking foods for the family, remember to separate the baby’s portion before adding seasoning or spices. Babies need very little, if any, added salt or sugar.

Thawing and Warming Baby’s Food

Here are some suggestions on thawing and warming food for your baby. Frozen food can be thawed in the refrigerator or the microwave oven on the defrost setting. But remember, food that has been thawed should never be refrozen.

Stove Method: To warm food, place it directly in a saucepan and slowly warm over low heat, stirring often. Stir and test temperature of food before feeding it to your baby.

Microwave Method: Microwave ovens heat foods unevenly and cause hot spots. There may be hot spots even if the food feels cool to you. It is important to stir food well to prevent burns to you or your baby. Here are some other tips:

• Cover dish with a microwave-safe cover, not plastic wrap.
• Stir food and turn the dish often during the heating process.
• Allow food to sit for a few minutes; stir well and test temperature before feeding your baby.
• It is not recommended to heat pureed meats in the microwave. Hot spots in the meat could seriously burn your baby.
• For other foods, heat food in a microwave-safe dish or an opened baby-food jar.

Equipment Needed to Make Baby Food

Sieve/strainer: It should have a small mesh. You can press foods through it with the back of a spoon. It can be used for juices, soft fruits and vegetables, but not meats.

Spoon, forks and potato masher: Use these to mash soft foods, such as most canned fruits, egg yolks, bananas and potatoes, to the right consistency.

Food mills or grinders: You may already have a food mill in your canning supplies, but if you don’t, they are available in stores that sell kitchen supplies. The smaller size baby food mill is similar to the larger version. They can be purchased in the baby section of department stores. It can be used at home or when traveling. The larger mills and grinders are useful when preparing soft meats and both can be used for cooked fruits, vegetables and soft fresh fruits.

Blenders: Your blender can come in handy to prepare food for the baby. Food items cooked for the family can be blended smooth for baby or to freeze for later. Hand-held blenders are useful pieces of equipment that you may want to consider.

Plastic ice cube trays: Use trays for freezing extra food that you prepare. After the food is frozen, remove the cubes and store in a container designed for freezing.

Pureed Baby Food Recipes

Pureed Fruit Delight

1/2 cup freshly cooked or home-canned fruits, or cooked dried prunes (without sugar) (Use apples, pears, peaches, nectarines, apricots or prunes)
2-4 teaspoons liquid (water, unsweetened fruit juice—not citrus—or formula)

Remove skin and seeds. Press through a sieve, or put ingredients in food mill or blender and puree until smooth. Serve or freeze. Freeze no longer than 1 month.

Applesauce Deluxe

1 medium apple
4 tablespoons pineapple juice

Peel, quarter and core apple. Cook with pineapple juice until soft. Blend until smooth in texture.

Bananas Plain and Simple

Ripe bananas may be pureed or mashed and fed to your baby directly.

Yummy Fresh Fruit

3/4 cup ripe fruit (uncooked peaches, nectarines, pears or apricots) without sugar
1 tablespoon unsweetened fruit juice (not citrus)

Remove skin and seeds. Puree ingredients in baby food mill or blender until smooth. Serve or freeze. Freeze no longer than 1 month.

Vegetable Medley

1/2 cup cooked fresh, frozen or canned vegetables (potato, sweet potato, green beans, peas, carrots, yellow squash), without salt added
2-4 tablespoons cooking liquid, formula or water

Cook fresh vegetables or use frozen or canned vegetables without salt or seasoning. (Read labels for ingredients.) Press vegetable chunks through a sieve or baby food mill. Thin with cooking liquid or formula to eating consistency. Or put cooked vegetables and liquid in a blender and puree until smooth. Serve or freeze. Freeze no longer than 1 month.

Note: After the individual vegetables have been fed several times, some good combinations are: potatoes and carrots, potatoes and green beans, carrots and peas.

Simple Strained Meat or Poultry
(for babies over 8 months)

1/2 cup cooked meat (small pieces of lean chicken, beef, turkey or pork)
2-4 tablespoons meat broth or formula

Cook lean meat (fat, skin and connective tissue removed) over low heat in a small amount of water. Puree meat and liquid until smooth. Serve or freeze. Freeze no longer than one month.

Egg Yolk Puree
(for babies over 8 months)

Cook one egg in simmering water 15 to 20 minutes. Remove shell. Remove yolk and mash with 1 tablespoon of formula or water until smooth. Serve or freeze. Freeze no longer than 1 month.

Note: Use only the yolk. Avoid feeding egg whites until 1 year to avoid problems with allergies. Use the extra egg white in the family’s casseroles, salads or sandwiches.

Your Choice Combo Dish
(for babies over 8 months)

1 cup cooked, cubed or diced meat (cut off fat)
1/2 cup cooked rice, potato, noodles or macaroni
2/3 cup cooked, diced vegetables
3/4 to 1 cup liquid (formula, broth or water)

Combine and blend until smooth. Serve or freeze in serving-size containers. If frozen, use within 1 month.

Note: If you prepare combination dishes, use them only after you have fed the individual food several times.

Creamy Custard
(for babies over 1 year)

3 egg yolks
2 tablespoons sugar
2 cups milk, warmed

Mix egg yolks and sugar. Stir in milk and mix well. Cook over low heat, stirring constantly, until mixture coats the spoon. Refrigerate. Use within 2 to 3 days

Nesting and Birds and Procrasting, Oh my!

Long time no write. I have missed my poor little blog, sitting here, isolated on the Internet with no one to show it love, not knowing if I would ever stop by to visit again. Well, fret not little blog. I am back. I figured that I would resist the lure of resting my wings on the couch, visiting with my good friend, the remote control or perching upon my comfy bed, with my well worn pajamas and a good book and instead, I would get up and write something! Can I get an amen for ambition?

As I enter my 34th week if pregnancy. I am finding it harder and harder to not only find ambition, but to then actually find the energy to follow through on anything I ambitiously start. Lets take for example, my weeks long goal of cleaning/organizing the garage. I will wake in the morning, feeling refreshed and ready to go, I will diligently proceed to follow through on my commitment to pulling everything out of the garage, spreading it across the living room floor, and scattering some boxes around to put things in. Then, suddenly, and without warning, I find myself utterly exhausted. engulfed by mountains of various items and empty boxes, sitting on my living room floor and thinking that said floor looks like a mighty comfy place to take a quick nap if I could just clear a space. Once this train of thought begins to roll along the tracks it is a lost cause to try to stop it. Suddenly my hands are furiously shoving items into boxes in no particular order, rushing to fling those boxes back into the garage, often leaving the space in a more wild state of disarray than when I had originally started and, once that feat is completed, promptly lowering myself into napping position so that I might drift into a relaxed, trance like state while promising myself that all will get done...tomorrow.

From what I hear, this reoccurring predicament is a fairly normal one for the "very pregnant", the "very very pregnant" and the "dangerously close to giving birth pregnant" women of our society. As common as it may be however, it is extremely frustrating to me as I have always been one to follow through with my commitments regardless of how time consuming or tedious they may be. I can't shake the feeling that I am constantly working on various home projects only to end up with more of a mess than I started with in the first place and wondering how I will ever get it all done.

What type of bird would I have made I wonder? Trying to create a nest for my offspring while dropping sticks, carelessly breaking them in half, shoving them into some random assortment, absentmindedly falling from trees and chirping some maniacal tune that no other bird could decipher while drifting off to sleep every hour....probably not a very good one.

Well, so here I am. In the midst of piles of housework, half finished projects and a nagging feeling of fatigue. Writing again is a start. It is more than a start actually. In the midst of all that is not done, this entry alone is a shining example of something that I started AND finished. Not only that, writing gets the creative juices flowing and makes me feel like I am using my brain for something other than eating and/or sleeping. I find that the more I write, the more I am inspired to write and this sets off a positive chain reaction where I am getting SOMETHING done. And that something, even if it is a small something, feels good.

So, on that happy note, let me just say to you: areva derche and bonswa my friends. Until next time...

I solemnly promise that my next entry/entries will be beautifully written, inspirational, groundbreaking, heart wrenching, New York Times Bestseller stuff and an absolute pleasure to read. OK, I do not promise any of those things. I do however promise (if only for myself) that it will not be such a long time before I write again. If it is all I can do to drag myself to the keyboard and type out a single, solitary coherent sentence, I will follow through to get the job done!

With Love,

-New Mommy in Town

Recipe for Happiness :)

Ingredients:

2 Heaping cups of Patience

1 Heart full of Love

2 Hands full of Generosity

1 Head full of Understanding

a Dash of Laughter

Cooking Instructions:

Sprinkle generously with kindness, add plenty of faith and mix well. Spread over a period of a lifetime and serve to everyone you meet.

Riding for Two

Being pregnant for the first time can easily be compared to being on a roller coaster, blindfolded. Not only do you find constant changes to your body, your emotions and your thought processes every day but you really have no idea what's coming next and when it does come (whatever "it" may be) you are left in the dark wondering, "is this normal"? You cannot anticipate what stomach dropping (no pun intended) careening turn will come next and then...the free fall. A barrage of conflicting, sometimes confusing (sometimes even hurtful-although well intentioned) messages from loved ones, big, scary words thrown out by doctors with little or sometimes no explanation, the feeling of worry that washes over you every time there is a random ache, pain or change in your body, worry not only for yourself but for your developing baby whom you are trying so hard to protect yet have no way of communicating with. The ride can be thrilling but it can also be downright terrifying.

And herein lies the reason that, I believe, every newly pregnant woman should treat herself to a copy of the pregnancy bible, "What to Expect When You're Expecting". This book has really been a lifesaver for me. It goes through, week by week of your pregnancy and advises on what to eat, weight gain, what will be covered at each doctors visit, where to find local resources, symptoms (what's normal, what's not and how to address), aches pains, sleep patterns, fetal development, childbirth techniques, etc...

The list goes on and on which is why the book was written rather than someone like me trying to cover every informational aspect of pregnancy since the beginning of time in a Google Blog. But I can say, speaking from experience, that I have found this book immensely helpful. Everything I have experienced thus far has been addressed in some way in this book and the sections that describe what the doctor will discuss at each visit have been spot on, helping to eliminate some of that "lost in the dark" feeling and the anxiety that comes with it. Another positive about the book is that many of the questions are sent in by pregnant readers and the responses to these questions, while informative are often humorous in a gentle, non-offensive way.

There is much comfort in reading the submissions of other women and realizing that I am not the first to have gone through this whole "pregnancy" thing and that pretty much everything I have experienced so far, no matter how scary it feels to me, has been a normal part of being a pregnant, worried, first time mommy. So, if you are pregnant, do yourself a favor, check out your local bookstore or jump on Amazon.com and get yourself a copy of this book. The price you pay for the book is worth the peace of mind it brings. Who wants to ride a roller coaster while pregnant anyway? Especially blindfolded. Yikes!

Here's to getting "off" the ride!

-New Mommy in Town

Some Say Love...

Found this quote tonight. So beautiful... I hope that one day when I look back over my life, I will find that my roots, my husbands roots and our children's roots have become one beautiful, strong tree!

Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are.

Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossoms had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and
not two.

--St. Augustine

Puzzle of the Day

Well...probably Puzzle of the Month (or Year) since I don't have a wealth of puzzles to choose from. Anyway, found this puzzle and thought it was an interesting question. Not sure what the answer is or if there is any right answer but seems like a fun one to think about! Maybe I will post more puzzles as I find them. :)

Enjoy!

You approach two talking doors. One door leads to your destination, while the other door leads to certain death. You do not know which door is which. You are able to ask only one question to determine which door is which. One door tells the truth, and one always lies. You want to go to the door of your destination. What question will you ask to determine which door leads to your destination, and why will it give you the correct answer?

The Case of The Pregnant Husband

As I continue into the foray of pregnancy and my baby continues to grow, move, kick and develop inside of me, I am not surprised to find that I am gaining weight, becoming more emotional and am requiring more sleep than I can ever remember wanting or needing. What I AM surprised by are the emotional outbursts, mood swings, weight gain and additional sleep requirements that my HUSBAND is exhibiting.

For example, last night, after sitting in somber, contemplative silence for most of the night, I ventured to ask my significant other what was on his mind. In response I received a grunt and a shoulder shrug. A few minutes later at the ripe old hour of 9:00pm on a Saturday night, he announced he was going to bed and moped upstairs (this after a five hour nap that afternoon, mind you). I went to lay down with him hoping to get some insight into what was on his mind. After laying in silence for several minutes, I asked him if he had any interest in buying a new I Phone. He replied that he did not. "Good, I remarked, I have heard bad things about them". Uh-oh! Apparently negative speak of I Phones was not to be on the menu this evening. "Well, I haven't heard bad things about them" he roared back at me, "EVERYONE I know that has one LOVES it" suddenly he launched into a rant about how I am always bashing him, criticizing everything he likes, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah... This rant continued for a few more minutes until I managed to ease my pregnant, aching back off the bed without doing any permanent harm to myself and escape to the relative safety (and quiet) of our living room. As I sat in silence in our darkened living room with my purring cat looking up from my lap as if to assure me that HE would never go off on me in such a manner I began to wonder, "Just exactly who is the pregnant one here?"

It seems that as my pregnancy has progressed, my husbands symptoms (aching back and feet, nausea, sleepiness, heartburn, mood swings, etc...) have increased at a much accelerated pace to any symptoms I have experienced. This can be frustrating because when I want to take up the whole couch and take a nap, he has beat me to it, when I want to be pampered, his back is hurting him, when I'm not feeling well, neither is he. Is this natures way of preparing me for child rearing? By first presenting me with a pregnant husband, desperately in need of my care?

This question still hung heavy on my mind as I tip toed back into the minefield of our bedroom. As I laid down as gently as possible so as not to wake the beast, he surprised me once again by wrapping his arms around me, lodging his head against my shoulder and whispering that he loved me. Instead of following my first instinct, which was to look at him like he had three heads and ask him just what planet of hormonal dysfunction he was residing on, I wrapped my arms around him and told him I loved him too. As I lay awake I acknowledged that, while there may be much confusion and many things I am not aware of regarding pregnant husbands (and pregnant wives for that matter) there is one thing I am 100% sure of, and that is this: For the rest of our hopefully long lives together, I will never ever speak poorly of the I Phone in my husbands presence again!

Dedicated to Pregnant Husbands (and Wives, and perhaps undeservingly judged I Phones Everywhere)

-New Mommy In Town

The Story of our Lives...

I heard from a friend today who mentioned that, in many ways, it is easier to be single than to be in a relationship. I agree. Being in a relationship means looking out for, considering the feelings of, budgeting for, buying for, etc...2, 3 or even more people. Every day I see more and more why they say that marriage and family is "work". Suddenly you have to consider the feelings and the effect your actions will have on your significant other and your children before any decision you make, you double your income and triple or quadruple your expenses. You have to divide chores, bills, responsibilities and duties. You have to provide guidance and be strong even when you are at your weakest. I can't even imagine how hard it gets when you have to begin worrying about such "real issues" as illness, social security benefits,medicare, etc...Aye yay yay. The thought of all that work alone can be enough to make even those most fond of the idea of committing run in the opposite direction when trying to decide whether to partner up.

But what is the flip side of all that "work"? I look at my beautiful grandmother who raised 4 children and now has 4 son and daughter in laws, 13 grand kids and a great grand baby on the way. I think about how close our family is and how we visit regularly and support each other through the good times and the bad. I recently watched my aunt and uncle renew their vows after 30 years of marriage (their 4 children served as their wedding "party) and the original minister that married them 30 years ago performed this ceremony. Many tears were shed in the audience as my uncle stated that he knew 30 years ago and he is even more sure now, that my aunt is the only woman for him while a slide show playing behind them showcased snapshots of their lives together accompanied by a song performed by their teenage daughter.

I looked over at my grandmother during the ceremony and wondered if there was any way that she could have predicted the many lives her life and love would create and touch over the span of her lifetime. Were it not for her, none of us would be here.

Although it is true that partnerships between lovers, friends, husbands and wives, may not last, and loving others can mean opening yourself up to an immeasurable amount of heartache, loss, sadness. work and vulnerability it can also mean opening yourself up to a world of love, laughter, creation and joy that in my book, is all that will really matter in the long run.

When I think of all the work that entering into marriage means, I also think about the incredible love, friendship and trust that my husband and I have built up in just the 6 years we have been together. I think of our baby that is on the way and the love we already have for him. I picture the sweet things that my husband does for me (kissing my belly each morning, rubbing my feet at night, greeting me with a big hug and kiss at the door each night, sending me sweet text messages during the day). I envision the life that is to come for us and the lives and memories that our love will create, and I can't imagine wanting things any other way...

Wishing Life, Love and Laughter for all of you,

-New Mommy in Town

7 Months and Counting

As I near my 28th week of pregnancy, I thought I might share some interesting facts about this stage of pregnancy that have been relayed to me through research and by my doctor. Some of them you may know, some are surprising. Either way, as Anais Nin so poignantly stated, "the possession of knowledge does not kill the sense of wonder and mystery. There is always more mystery." So read on....

*At week 28, the baby has reached 2 1/2 lbs and can be up to 16 inches long.

*Baby can now blink, cough, suck, hiccup, take practice breaths and dream (by this stage the baby has begun to get REM sleep)-SO AMAZING!

*Baby's lungs are fully mature by now.

*You will want to begin researching postpartum medication or treatments.

*Baby is getting into position to be born and may be resting on your Sciatica nerve, causing pain through the lower part of the spine that radiates down through your legs. Swimming or water exercises, a warm heating pad, stretching and getting off your feet can help ease this pain.

*Most women go into labor at around 40 weeks, so still another 3 months to go. (Sigh)

*Fetal activity is usually stronger and more frequent.

*Leg cramps, back aches and itchy abdomen may continue/increase for mom.

*Your doctor will give you a Glucose screening test to check for gestational diabetes.

*You will want to begin counting kicks-Morning and night are the most active times. You should be able to feel 10 kicks, flutters or movements within 10 minutes.

*Work out your pelvic floor muscles (with kegel exercises)try to do three sets of 20 daily. Bonus-they make delivery easier, sex better AND you can do them anywhere.

*Now is the time to begin discussing birth plans, whether you will want pain medication during labor and the best type for your situation, breathing exercises, what to bring with you to the hospital the day of your delivery, etc...with your doctor.

7 months and counting (well, counting those kicks anyway).

-New Mommy in Town

Letter To My Son

I can clearly recall the day that I first found out, I was pregnant with you. I had just returned from meeting your daddy for lunch, at the shipyard in Portland , Oregon where he was working. I had suspected for a few weeks that I might be pregnant but was putting off taking any tests mainly due to my fear of the unknown. That day, I knew that I could not hold off any longer. I went to the drugstore and bought a pregnancy test. It tested positive. I went back to the drug store and bought another test. That tested positive too. I went to the dollar store and bought 6 pregnancy tests. All positive.

As I sat in the midst of my sea of pregnancy tests, I felt a mixture of emotion and questions like I had never experienced before? Would I make a good mom? Was I too selfish of a person to make room in my life for a child? Would your father be happy to hear the news, scared, excited, overwhelmed? Your father wouldn’t be home for a few more hours, which may as well have been years as I sat and watched the clock wondering when would be the best time to tell him. It turned out that the best time was to blurt out the news right when he walked in the door. I asked him to sit down and I told him that I loved him more than anything and then I said, “I’m pregnant”. He sat there in stunned silence for a bit and then he asked to be alone. I don’t know what he was feeling, or what I was feeling for that matter. It wasn’t that we didn’t want kids or hadn’t talked about having them it was just not something that we were necessarily prepared for right then. We were getting married in a month and had planned to take a honeymoon, come home, settle in and start looking at buying a house. It seemed that now, all that was to be put on hold, perhaps indefinitely.

In the days that followed, my emotions swung from daydreams of picture perfect scenarios of being a mother to utter sadness at what would be the loss of my life as I had always known it. Suddenly, my life was not mine anymore, my life was and would forever now be all about your life. Everything that was previously mine would now be yours. Sometimes the thought of no longer just living for me seemed incomprehensible and terrifying.

My emotions vacillated between these extremes for weeks as I contemplated the changes to my body and my outlook that pregnancy and raising a child would bring. Your daddy didn’t seem to share my fears as he encouraged me to sleep, kissed my belly in the morning and called us “his loves”. I was amazed at his ability to love you, even before you were fully formed, and it reminded me of all the things that I love about him and assured me that he would be an amazing father. Still, I felt in some way that I was not living up to my part of the bargain. Everything that I read made it seem as though every woman is instantly overjoyed to find out she is pregnant. I could not find any articles on sadness, fear or being overwhelmed with finding out that you are pregnant. I felt alone and like maybe there was something wrong with me. Was I not going to be a good mother? With trepidation and excitement, I made an appointment for my first ultrasound, hoping that the doctor would be able to help me answer some of the questions I had.

At 14 weeks I went in to have my first Ultrasound. The doctor that saw me was wonderful. She assured me that I was not alone in any of my feelings and gave me the names and contact information for support groups and exercise groups for first time moms. She checked my weight and measurements and assured me that everything looked normal. She then rubbed an enhancing gel on my stomach and used a machine that employed sound waves to pull up an image of you on the screen. She laughed as she noted that it was hard to get a clear image of you because you were moving so much and I thought, “he’ll be restless, always wanting to be in the go, just like his mama”. Then, something magical happened, the clearest picture of you appeared on the screen. I could see in full detail, the shape of your head and the outline of your nose, mouth, eyes and lips. There you were, lying peacefully in my stomach, kicking your tiny legs and rubbing your eyes with your tiny fists, sheltered from the loud outside world by the silence and insulation of my belly. You turned right to the screen at one point as though looking right at me and saying, “it’s going to be all right mom” then, you put your hand, palm down against my belly. It was right then that I fell utterly, hopelessly, completely in love with you. As I cried and laughed at the same time, I knew that from that moment on, I would do anything for you. Whether that means cutting out all alcohol, caffeine and junk food during pregnancy, changing diapers and staying up all night to soothe your tears, bandaging skinned knees or mourning the loss of a loved pet or friend with you. I will be there for you, for whatever time god allows us to be together, I will be by your side to protect you, to love you, to guide you and to cherish you. As you are forming in my stomach, each little kick or stretch that I feel inside of me makes you all the more real and special. I rub my belly and talk to you and let you know how much you are loved, already, and you haven’t even made your grand entrance into the world yet. Your daddy has bought you a crib, and toys and car seats and clothes. Your nursery is all set up and ready to go. You have a multitude of aunts, uncles, cousins, friends and family that are eagerly awaiting your arrival and can’t wait to meet you. You are so loved little one. You are loved now, you will be loved tomorrow and every day after. What is conceived in love, is sure to find love in the world it is brought into, and that is my wish for you, that you will always carry our love for you in your heart and let that love be your guide.

What is mine, what is ours, will forever be yours.

-Your Mommy

Got Glow?

Throughout my life, whenever I thought of pregnancy, I would think of this “glow” that everyone seems to love to refer to when discussing the many joys of pregnancy. So naturally, when I myself became pregnant, I waited with baited breath for this beautiful, ethereal glow that would bestow itself upon me, lighting up rooms with its presence and signaling to others that I came bearing child.

Hmmmm….Six and a half months and so far…no glow  Well, unless of course that glow has been a round of acne, the likes of which I haven’t witnessed since High School. Or the feeling of being unbearably warm in perfectly temperature controlled rooms causing my face to be shades of red darker than others in the same room. Perhaps this glow encompasses the fact that I have begun snoring like a trucker (well, according to my husband anyway) and have had to endure my share of wardrobe malfunctions and necessary adjustments to self image and every day movement. I am almost certain that this “glow” is not referring to the fact that my hair has dried out while my skin has become oily and I am increasingly not able to see over my belly (let alone actually bend over it) in order to efficiently handle personal grooming tasks that I once took for granted. (i.e. shaving my legs and painting my toenails). Some of these changes I did expect on some level but it took the experience of becoming completely out of breath and utterly exhausted one day while trying to complete the daunting task of swatting a loaded nail polish brush at my overgrown toenails for nearly a half hour only to end up with a pedicure that would make even the most seasoned nail salon technician gasp in horror to make me wonder- WHY DOES NO ONE EVER MENTION THIS STUFF? Followed quickly by my second question- AND JUST WHERE, EXACTLY, IS MY GLOW? Of course these are rhetorical questions given the fact that there is most likely no glow and that women that speak of such a glow either:

A) Have not been pregnant or

B) Have some level of delusion that causes them to look in the mirror and mistake acne, blotched skin and bad nail painting jobs for a beautiful glow.

Now granted, there are more than one or two beautiful things that DO come along with pregnancy. For example, feeling your baby kick for the first time, or seeing them move on an ultrasound screen, or just the sheer joy of being able to bond with your child for a full 9-10 months before they come into the world, these are just some of the beautiful things that women are blessed with during pregnancy. And as to why generations upon generations of women have decided to favor THOSE details rather than passing along the the shocking, embarrassing, sometimes downright foul stories that are also a part of being pregnant, well, that’s easy. Because if all those little inconvenient truths were disclosed right from the beginning, that most likely would have been the end of humanity, right then and there, nobody would have ever gotten pregnant again.

So, having resigned myself to the fact that this glow is not forthcoming but that my husband still thinks I’m beautiful and learning to favor the nice things about pregnancy rather than the not quite so nice. I simply keep on keeping on. Comforting myself with the fact that ages of strong, powerful women have gone before me and that our ability to withstand the awkwardness and uncomfortableness of it all for 9-10 months is what has sustained humanity. All the while, being mindful to hide my feet in the safety of closed-toed shoes.

Life, Love and Laughter,

-New Mommy in Town

Hey Mom-Don't Forget to Take Care of YOURSELF!!!

In the course of being pregnant, I have had terrible morning sickness (only for the first three months though-lucky me!). I went through a phase where I could not stomach the thought of consuming any kind of dairy product (VERY strange for me as I could normally have cheese for breakfast lunch and dinner and be completely satisfied).I was then struck with a terrible, wheezing cough for about 6 days that only allowed me an average of about three hours of sleep a night (sometimes two). I called my primary health physician a couple times over these six days and was told that the cough was just something that was “going around”. She gave me a list of acceptable medications I could take and told me that no amount of coughing could hurt the baby but that I should definitely come in if I began to feel any significant amount of pain, or if I began vomiting, contracting or spotting. Throughout all of this and seemingly continuing with no end in sight, I have been suffering from the occasional 3 day migraine headache, terribly painful bouts of nightly heartburn and the sensation that I am going to pull my back out every time I get out of bed or get up off the couch too quickly.

Now, I know that I have had an easier pregnancy than some, but with my low threshold for pain tolerance and with this being my first pregnancy, I have sometimes felt overwhelmed and lost as I figure out what medications are safe for the baby, what I can and cannot eat, what I should and should not be eating and what it all means for myself and the baby. Luckily, I am an information junkie and I am relentless in my pursuit of that information, esp. when it pertains to something close to my heart (i.e. the health of myself and my baby). Although getting my hands on the information I need has been a sometimes difficult and tiresome process and has entailed me pulling together a wealth of information from Internet searches, doctors visits and incessant reading, I am eager to share what I have learned and to pool that information in the hopes that it will possibly put someone else’s mind at ease or make their foray into the unknown a bit less confusing and a bit more comforting. Please note that the below recommendations have all been verified by my doctor. I am sure not all of these remedies will work for everyone but they are what worked for me and what I was assured are safe for both mom and baby!

Morning (or all day) Sickness

I know that there are a variety of blogs and discussion groups out there, all recommending a wide range for tips and remedies for morning sickness. I can only speak for what worked for me. It seemed that anything sour or anything with an overpowering flavor seemed to settle my stomach. Chewing any type of mint gum worked quite well as did drinking water with lemon juice in it. Popsicles also worked at holding off any stomach upset but gum and lemon water seemed to work best. I also found that anything carbonated seemed to do the trick but that sometimes the syrup in sodas would make me feel equally as sick. To get around this, I began mixing ¾ of a glass of club soda with a splash or two of fruit juice which proved to be refreshing, non-nausea inducing and helped me get the necessary amount of water I needed each day. Another trick that worked for me was taking my prenatal vitamin at night, right before bed. I found that if I took it in the morning, it increased my feelings of nausea throughout the day.

Exercise

Having to cut back on my regular exercise regimen of 30 minutes of high intensity aerobic kickboxing followed by 30 minutes of weight training 5 times a week has been difficult. I felt that modifications to my normal routine were not sufficient and I found myself feeling sluggish and overly tired. I have tried different programs (including prenatal yoga and swimming) but I have found what really has given me the best results and left me feeling my best has been water aerobics. I found an ongoing, three days a week water aerobics program in my neighborhood where the instructor presents challenging exercises while encouraging me to only do what I can do and to stop if I feel any pain or over exertion. In this program we use Styrofoam weights that are the equivalent of 8 lb weights when used with the resistance of the water. This class has been esp. enjoyable during these summer months and I feel that I am getting a similar workout to what I am used to only at a lower level of impact.

Headaches

I found that the best remedy for headaches was getting enough sleep. My headaches subsided once I began taking an hour nap every afternoon, getting to bed at a set time of 10pm every night and making sure I got a full 8 hours of sleep. While I still get the occasional headache, I have been assured that it is safe to take extra strength Tylenol and this (combined with the additional sleep) has worked very well.

Heartburn

This has been a difficult one for me as almost everything I consume seems to give me heartburn. However, the following should help and are considered safe by doctors as long as they are taken in moderation:

Tums- As long as you are not taking more than 4 a day, Tums can help to reduce heartburn and can be used to assist you in get any additional calcium you may be lacking If you are not getting the daily recommended allowances through other sources.

Milk- now that I am able to stomach some dairy products, milk can help to coat the stomach lining and reduce heartburn.

Cutting out greasy, spicy and overly processed foods- I have found that foods that are natural or organic and not filled with too much junk content has really helped to reduce heartburn. The more natural the food, the easier it is for your body to process.

Not lying down right after eating- This can be helpful at bedtime too. If I am suffering from heartburn at bedtime, I take one Tums tablet and prop some pillows behind my head and then fall asleep in a half sitting position. Not the most natural sleeping position but better than sleeplessness inducing heartburn!

Water- Drinking a glass of ice cold water has worked well for me when I have mild heartburn. However, I have heard that for some, this increases heartburn. So, once again, every person is different and what works for some, might not work for others.

Cough or Cold Symptoms

Regular Robitussin- This was recommended by my doctor and worked well for holding off my coughing at night so that I could sleep.

Benadryl- Also worked well for reducing coughing as well as runny nose and helped me sleep better at night.\

Vitamin C- While I was sick, I took a daily vitamin C supplement on top of drinking a half glass of orange juice mixed with a half glass of club soda two to three times a day.

Cough Drops- Helped me breathe easier, reduced coughing and stuffy nose

Vicks Vapo Rub-Applied to the chest, throat and under the nose, this helped to reduce coughing, ease congestion and relax sore throat muscles.

The above are all the remedies I can think of at the moment that have gotten me through the magical, somewhat debilitating, never dull adventures of pregnancy thus far. Hope these ideas help. And, of course, if you are pregnant and have ANY questions about symptoms, are noticing anything out of the ordinary or are considering a new treatment for any symptoms your first call should always be to your medical advice nurse or your primary health care physician as they will be able to help you identify options that are safest and will work best for both you and your baby!

A happy mom makes for a happy baby!

-New Mommy in Town

Maternity Pants Saved My Life

Such a silly title but I am starting to feel the truth of this statement.

I am a 30 yr. old woman, expecting my first child in November 2009. Being a first time mom at this age seems equally optimal and terrifying. While I feel that I have never been more ready for children, I also feel like I have never been so clueless about anything. Take the maternity pants for example...

I was trying not to buy maternity pants, trying to somehow trick myself into thinking that I would be maybe the first woman ever to not need them. My little plan was working pretty well until about 5 months into my pregnancy when even the fattest jeans that I had hidden away in the back of my closet simply refused to zip. After an especially humiliating day where I tried to rubber band the button on said jeans and go to the grocery store, only to find that my shirt was a bit too small and my unzipped jeans were on display to anyone that cared to notice, I decided right then and there that I was a strong woman and that I could and would summon the strength and courage I would need to do it. I would go shopping for maternity clothes!

The next day I confidently strutted into my nearest department stores maternity section, sure that I was to find the hip, slimming maternity clothes I was seeking. To my disappointment, I was met by aisle after aisle of shapeless dresses (some of them denim) sequined tops, bras with industrial sized straps, bathing suits with industrial sized ruffles, and the occasional, large, "look-at-me", mid-section embellishing bow. Not to be discouraged, I visited store after store, only to be met with the same, sordid fate. By the end of the day, I returned home exhausted, put my sore, swollen feet up on the coffee table and let my mind wonder about what sort of terrible harm a pregnant woman could have inflicted on the inventor of maternity clothes to have caused such obvious retaliation.

After going out to dinner with my husband that night in my too small jeans, I returned home and had to run upstairs to change into some stretchy pants before the button on my jeans literally cut into my stomach. "Pants shouldn't hurt" I thought miserably as I drifted off to sleep that night...

Fast forward to a week later...I enlisted the help of my mother and my aunt for moral support as I took on the maternity clothes search once again. My aunt, having had three children, and my mother, having had 2, proved to be just what I needed and they navigated me passed the horror of stonewashed jean dresses and tent sized blouses into much less shock inducing aisles of cute black capris pants, stretchy but form fitting skirts and empire waist tops in cute, breezy colors. After one day of shopping with these lovely ladies, I had done the impossible, I was able to find cute pants, shirts and skirts that I will be able to wear throughout my pregnancy. And, the best part is, now, when I put on my pants, there is no life or death, asthma inducing struggle involved. I simply pull on clothes and go. Plus, the elastic waists make everything seamless.

I feel that being pregnant has been a constant flow of learning experiences, each that will bring me closer to being the enlightened mother I would like to be (or at least a not-quite-so clueless-one). Each day I am reveling, laughing (or cringing) at helpful hints, horror stories and happy stories that I hear from other mothers, doctors or relatives. If I am learning so much already, I cannot even imagine, all the knowledge, wisdom and humility that will surely come with motherhood. I know that not all of it will be easy, breezy, "loving every minute" but at the same time, I wait with baited breath and my own childlike anticipation for all the experiences that this new future will hold for my family and I.

Wishing all Mommies to be the joy of discovery!

-New Mommy in Town